That State Farm ad where.....

William decided to rewrite Psalm 73 in his own words, which was a very interesting and powerful exercise. I decided to rewrite a certain ad that drives me crazy on the same day. How amazing. We obviously think alike, sort of.

I don't know if any of you have heard or seen the State Farm ad that begins, "You know the place where...." For some reason, when I heard it the first time on NPR, read by the impassive guy who reads the ads, it just sounded wrong. I've been trying to figure out why. Perhaps it's because a big insurance company is trying to make itself feel like a friend. Or like a Good Neighbor.

The NPR ad ended with "Meeting you At That Place Where questions about insurance meets an agent with answers." It just sounded funny out loud, and I had to ask how often the average person actually has burning questions about insurance. I do know something, because I used to be the person who was The Agent With Answers full time. I enjoyed it, but usually Questions About Insurance had to do with a life crisis, or a bill increase. Not the sort of thing you want to chat with a stranger about, necessarily.

Then, I began to see the ads in my Real Simple Magazine. The pattern is "You know the place where (insert abstract relational thought) meets (concrete reality statement). So I thought I'd try to make up my own ads. Maybe you can think of some too.

"You know the place where Sleeping Children Look Like Angels meets Who Wet Mommy's Bed. I'm there. Pull Ups, for those special times of sharing."

"You know the place where It's Saturday Morning! Let's Take a Drive meets A Hungry Husband With Plummeting Blood Sugar. I'm there. Cheese sticks, to keep the crisis at bay."

"You know the place between Browsing the Makeup Aisle Feeling Creative and Realizing This New Eyeshadow Makes Me Look Peaked. I'm there. Coconut Oil, for that hard to remove kind."

"You know the place where I Love My New Hermit Crab meets Where Is My New Hermit Crab. I'm there. Band-aids, for that sudden pinch in the night."